Weddings are never easy to organize and come through unless you can pay someone to arrange and follow through with everything. You’ll need to get so many people to agree on things and cooperate, not to mention getting everything you want exactly how you want it. They are certainly not easier when children are involved, and it is much harder to get the kids to cooperate than adults. Here are a few tips to help you have a successful wedding while fully involving your children:
MAKE SURE THAT THE CHILD IS INVOLVED IN THE PREPARATIONS
This is an excellent way of making sure that the children understand what is going on and what is expected of them. Please make sure that they tag along in the wedding preparations. You could make it fun for them by having them help out with fun stuff like making pom-poms, trying out for wedding outfits for mom and tasting the cake.
If you are short on time, however, you may want to keep them off your working table. You can get them a smaller one with similar materials, so they don’t feel left out. This should work out just fine, especially with stubborn toddlers and kids.
GIVE THEM A ROLE
It is probably best if you don’t give them one that will be highly relied upon for the wedding to be a success. A role, however, makes them feel important and responsible for something big. This way, it may be easier for them to practice and prepare just as they would for a school play.
For instance, you could let them bring the ring down the aisle or blow the celebratory trumpet when you are pronounced husband and wife. You can almost count on it to not go as planned; children get overwhelmed with attention and may decide to do something completely different, like throw a tantrum in the middle of it all or just freeze in place. Make sure you have a contingency for that. For instance, you could have an adult ready to pick them up.
BRING A BABYSITTER
You’ll need one unless you plan to hold your baby through the entire ceremony and trust me, that will most certainly not work out well. We’re talking out-of-the-blue tantrums, inappropriate yelling and questions, changing, feeding and a lot more things you don’t want to stop your ceremony for. This is one day you’ll have everyone looking at you throughout the day.
The best way to avoid this is by having a babysitter attend the wedding. It would help very much if it is someone who has spent lots of time with the child – familiarity will make the child more pleasant. The babysitter could then be in charge of the baby the entire day so that they can hold them when you can’t and help them get through the day without missing their parents.
You could break from the ceremony once in a while to check up on them and make sure that they are okay and don’t miss you too much. Make sure that the sitter has everything they need from clothes to change into to food and entertainment for the child. It also doesn’t have to be someone too unfamiliar; it could be a family member or your close friend. Whoever you give this responsibility, make sure that you trust them well enough to handle the baby the whole day without you worrying about their safety and whereabouts. Remember, baby’s safety first.
TRY TO EXPLAIN WHAT IS HAPPENING
If your child is older than a toddler, try your best to explain to them why there will be so many people around them the whole day and what will be happening. The concept of marriage is relatively hard to understand even as an adult, so don’t bombard your child with too much information. Be as gentle as you can and guide them to understand what will be expected of them. Explanations have always worked better than blunt orders, so even if the child will probably not grasp even half the magnitude of the event, they will at least have an idea of what is happening, and may even remember what mummy and daddy told them to do.
INTRODUCE THE CHILD TO THE GUESTS
Children love attention, so it would be great if they are getting some from the guests. If most of those attending are family who knows the child, they will probably be taking every chance to say hi and even hold them. If the child is friendly and does well in social settings, they will simply enjoy the day and give you no problem at all. The problem comes in when they are looking at everyone as strangers.
It would be nice to let your unfamiliar guests know that you have a child and that they will be in attendance. This way, they will not ignore him when they come across him.
In conclusion, weddings are meant to be happy events with fair participation from every member of the family. This also involves your child, and if you ignore them, you’ll most likely be dealing with the consequences in your white gown in front of your guests. Let the child feel that they are part of the event. The best way to go around this would be to get a nanny who can babysit the whole day until the festivities are over and you are ready to get back the child.